#projectbaby

Every now and then I have these 'moments' that make me stop and realise how lucky I am. 

I can say that now with confidence cause I'm no longer feeling sorry for myself, but last year, 2016, or as I have nicknamed it.. #projectbaby2016 felt like my worst (and best) year yet.

Unfortunately, I was not one of those women who blinked and fell pregnant quickly. I spent the most part of 2016 prepping myself for IVF. And despite what you think you might know about IVF, for me, this was NOT an overnight process. 

I waited to see doctors, I waited for results, I waited to fall naturally, I waited for a period, I waited to start IVF which then lead to even more waiting.

I waited for my eggs to be retrieved, I waited for my embryos to be fertilised, I waited for them to be biopsied for genetic testing, then to be stored and frozen for two and half months until I waited for a natural cycle to occur so they could then be transferred, which of course leads to the infamous 'two week wait'. 

I remember at one point feeling like I should have written a book and called it "What to Expect When You Are Still Not Expecting", or " What to Expect When You Are Expecting To Be Expecting." The wait was destroying me.

During this time, one of those defining 'moments' struck one particular evening whilst flicking through channels. My husband quickly alerted me to switch to Nat Geo as March of the Penguins was just starting. 

Yes, the documentary.

Reluctantly (and with eyes rolling) I watched on as he insisted it was a touching documentary about penguins. (My enthusiasm lowering by the second).

Until I watched on and realized, it was more than that.

This heartwarming documentary unfolded the story of one year in the life of a flock of penguins as they trek across the freezing Antarctic on a year long journey that has them facing just about every major life experience: from birth to death, from dating to mating, from comedy to tragedy, and from finding love to fighting for survival in the harshest conditions on Earth.

As I watched in awe as the tears rolled down my face, it showed me that it is not only the human who sometimes have to overcome daunting obstacles to create human life but the poor penguin who have to hustle to pro-create also.

So I eventually stopped the pity party and embraced the mammoth IVF task and enjoyed my journey from infertility to pregnancy. 

I'm sorry to my nearest and dearest, who had to hear about my anticipated specialist appointments, my husbands sperm, my fibroids and uterus, my polycystic ovaries, the ovulation tests, negative pregnancy results, the surprise periods, the many blood tests and the gory details of my egg collection and frozen embryo transfer.

But fast forward to today:

I am 38 weeks pregnant, am bracing myself for the challenges of motherhood, I'm farewelling the past, welcoming the new future and taking another conscious 'moment' (before I am sleep deprived and covered in vom) to document my gratitude for the miracle of creating human life...

And for the new found respect I have for the humble penguin.

When life gives you lemons....

"When life gives you lemons, make lemonade."

Im sure you have all heard this all before. Well, so had I. But it never fully sunk in, until now.

I always knew the meaning of this old saying but after a recent handling of some serious lemons myself, I fully, wholeheartedly 'get-it'.

According to Wikipedia, Lemons suggest 'sourness' or difficulty in life, where lemonade is sweet.

I'm proud to admit I personally have taken lemonade making to a whole new level this year and have surprised myself of my inner strength and capabilities.

I'm also kinda lucky too in my profession, as I get the extra scoop on other peoples personal stories so I know I am not the only person dealing with lemons, infact it is certain that everyone will be handed a load of lemons at different stages of life.

Sometimes, it's easy to compare your lemons to your friends, or to someone you walk past in the street, or that overly filtered, big-boobed, fit stranger on Instagram, but thats the beauty of this lovely, vibrant citrus fruit. They are all the same. No ones lemons are more sour than the other.

The only difference between them is how we handle them and what we do with them, so do not compare and do not spend too long feeling sorry for yourself.

Take control of what you can, stay balanced doing things that make you happy, be grateful for the things you have and always look for the lesson in every negative circumstance so you can apply it to the future of lemonade making.

Now I am aware I am not a professional psychologist but I'm a hairdresser, so that means I'm close, right?!  To anyone and everyone juggling a tonne of lemons, please enjoy my basic recipe for this sugary drink.  Add ice. Add mint, Add Vodka if you wish, whatever makes you happy.

Be Here Now

'Living in the moment.'

Sounds simple enough, right?

Well, as a self confessed 'Over-Thinker', this was on my list of things to improve for 2016 and is something I am working on, and when I say 'working on', I really mean, struggling with.

I struggle allowing myself to be 'in the moment' as my over-thinking mind wants to constantly be two (or ten) steps ahead of my current situation. 

Perhaps this has something to do with being a woman AND a hairdresser  (aka multi-tasker and a constant forward-thinker)

Here's the thing though, I've recently taken notice that it's not just me, (phew!) I have observed that we are ALL constantly after more and utterly obsessed with whats next.

The single girls are desperate to meet Mr Right.

The coupled up ladies are longing for a diamond on their finger.

The engaged women are pinning their dream wedding on pinterest.

The newlyweds are contemplating a new bathroom renovation or perhaps an overseas holiday before they pump out their first child.

I'm certain the new mothers with one child are silently pondering the second.

I'm pretty confident there is a genre of forty-somethings perhaps wondering if the grass-is-greener.  (if you catch my drift) 

And no doubt the parents with grown-up children are predictably waiting on becoming grandparents. 

Does it ever end?

When will we ever finally be content?

Are we responsibly 'goal setting' the inevitable next stage of life? Or just plain old over-thinking?

I don't know. But what I do know is that whilst I THINK I'm being clever by subconsiously trying to CONTROL what lies ahead,  I'm actually failing at making the most of my current life situation. 

So by writing this post, I feel I'm making myself more accountable to make a better effort to stop over-thinking about over- thinking.

I will try to avoid the drivers seat and promise to enjoy the unpredictable ride in the back. (eek)

I swear to switch the mind off (sometimes), roll with the punches (every now and then) and work on being here, NOW. 

The Great Escape.

Have you ever had a burning desire to want to learn more about taking photos of your food? Yeh well neither did I.

But my husband did. So late last year, he typed into google, 'Food Photography Courses'. After abit of searching, he came across a gorgeous blog called 'Local is Lovely' which showcased an option of workshops on offer. This one read:

Join Marta Greber, (photographer, food stylist and blogger at ‘What should I eat for Breakfast today’), Simone Hawlisch, (freelance photographer, visual storyteller and gifted teacher), Sydney-based photographer and all-round beautiful human Luisa Brimble and myself, food writer and blogger Sophie Hansen, for 2 1/2 days learning, sharing and telling stories together at Kimbri farm (just 2 1/2 hours west of Sydney) – which, I have to say, is especially beautiful in early Autumn! Hosted on March 16-18, 2016. 

He called to me immediately and asked me if i would be keen. Happy to just have plans for my birthday (18th March) and escape the norm, i was SOLD!

I'm not going to lie, I had been so busy leading up to these dates that I really hadn't put a lot of thought into whether or not I was well suited to this sort of workshop. Turns out I wasn't. I was the only person (out of 20) without a Canon, Nikon or Leica. However, i was determined to not be defeated by my lack of technical camera knowledge, so i gripped my iPhone firmly in the palm of my hands ready to snap away. 

I can't begin to tell you how inspiring this experience was for me. Did i really just spend the morning of my 31st birthday watching the sunrise amongst the morning fog in a paddock, sharing breakfast and creating magical memories with people who were only strangers to me just over a day ago? The entire two and a half days were filled with 'pinch me' moments.

I felt like i was on the set of a Country Style magazine every single minute of the day, eating from Martha Stewart's kitchen, mingling with some seriously unforgettable, incredibly inspiring women. Everyone from different ages, backgrounds, cities, countries, upbringings, states and job descriptions, all brought together for different reasons but by the same common interests.

It truly also made me realise that none of this becomes possible without a little bit of passion and a whole lot of Instagram. yep, Social Media. Whether you love it or hate it, I'm sticking with it. (you've just gotta stop following those damn Kardashians and find some real women to be in awe of).

Sophie Hansen - @locallovely

Luisa Brimble - @luisabrimble 

Marta Greber - @whatforbreakfast

Simone Hawlisch - @fraeuleinsonntag

Find them on instagram or stalk their websites, and hopefully you will see the beauty in what they do.

Photo taken by the talented Justine Kajtar @justinekajtar 

Photo by Justine Kajtar @justinekajtar

Afternoon refreshments in the olive grove

an afternoon stroll through the olive groves

our humble abode for the duration of our stay

View fullsize

AND thats a wrap.

A note to my loved ones

Clients often ask me about my loved ones, and with Valentines Day approaching, I have seized the opportunity to share with you the love letters to my top five most LOVED hair products.

Dear Dry Shampoo,

Aaah, you are the quintessential modern-day must-have for co-operative hair. You help my clean hair feel dirty and my dirty, flat hair feel clean. How do you DO that?? It surprises me how many people don't realise you exist or who have bought you but don't know HOW to use you. (Remember ladies, keep it at a distance when spraying or you run the risk of looking older and greyer.)

Dear Final Net Hair Spray,

You have literally changed my life. You are my everything when it comes my profession and my personal life. You do the trick when taming the fly aways or spraying my eyebrows into place when i was in my teens. I have inhaled your fumes since the 80's when i was just a small girl watching my Mum abuse the hell out of you on her perm and i continue to secretly enjoy your slightly toxic scent. You are never too sticky or too wet so i pray to the universe you never get discontinued!

Dear GHD,

What did I do before you? Whether it be straight, curled or loosely waved, you've helped me through it. You stood by me on my wedding day and continue to support me through thick hair and thin. Even though you damage my ends, i still continue to come back for more. You are the solution to every bad hair day and have taught me to love myself again after all those years with my head on the ironing board. (as if you don't remember that!)  Cloud 9, Silver Bullet, Miracurl. Pfft. No matter who tries to be you...They will never come close! GHD, I love you.

Dear Comb/s, 

Wide tooth, cutting comb, teasing comb, foiling comb. From my wallet, to the shower, in my travel cases and the bottom of the handbag, I make sure you exist. You come in all different shape and sizes and are all essential in your own little way. Wide tooth comb, you serve me well in the shower where i use you to distribute the conditioner evenly throughout my ends. Teasing comb, you offer me the right amount of boof I need in all the right places but it's the cutting comb i need to apologise to. Since the husband has a new hairstyle, he has discovered your ability to tame and part his hair and often never puts you back where you belong. Soz.

Dear Bobby Pins, 

Bobbies, you little buggers. I know you travel in packs of hundreds, but just as well, as i seem to lose you at a rapid rate! It doesnt help that i give away a shitload. Come to think of it, I probably don't treat you right at all. I do hold you in between my teeth before i stick you in a nest of hair sprayed hair on special occasions and give a tonne of you away at weddings and school formals. I must confess, that sometimes i would even rather vacuum you up then bend down to rescue you from the floor. Sorry. You've been good to me, besides the splitting headache or two after a long day, i really need you.

Hair like this only made possible with my top 5 essential products

Crazy for Christmas

As a hairdresser, the Christmas rush begins early November, when clients start getting race-day ready, booking in their work christmas party blowdries, girls start school formal prepping and the usual grey victims ramp up the frequency of their appointments. The result for me? Lots of long days, late nights and leaving my own self pampering, to last. I whinge the entire month of the Christmas build up, but I must admit, deep down, it all excites me.

Besides the crazy gift buying rush and wanting to ram every person infront of you at the shops, it is known to be a time for giving. I know there are still many thousands of selfless people who still believe that it is far better to give than to receive. But I am NOT yet convinced. 

I give greatly, but i receive whole heartedly. No matter my age, I still get a buzz out of opening gifts. I love everything about gifts, from the card to the wrapping, to the thought of whats inside. Here are a few of my favourites this Christmas.

the exciting build up..

the aftermath. a few of my favourite gifts..

beautiful words exchanged by loved ones.

Diamond studs from hubby.

And just like that, its over. 

I still love the time between Christmas and New Years Eve. I have no concept of the date and couldn't tell you what day it is. I spend these days being lazy, reading, watching movies and de-cluttering old stuff to prepare for the 'new'.  And even the thought of a brand new year excites me.

Thankyou to all my loyal and lovely clients for your support and generosity thought the year.

2016, bring it. New Year, New Desires, New Dreams. xx

Creativity takes courage

This year, in early July, I felt an itch. This happens to me every now and then. I started to feel like I needed a refreshing change of 'normal'. So I decided to satisfy my craving...

After being immersed in the hairdressing world for 14 years, I felt it was time to explore a new creative path in a different industry. One that allowed me to escape my comfort zone, to grow, to learn and to challenge myself. (I know what you are thinking and NO i have not quit hairdressing and YES, I have gone mad!)

A friend referred me to do a Fast Track (15 week) Certificate IV Course in Interior Design at International School of Colour and Design (ISCD) in North Sydney and boy was it fast! (Another crazy stunt).

But I cannot thank her enough. (Thanks Peri) :) WHAT A JOURNEY!

One of the first lessons in class I remember our beautiful teacher Katie saying “after you have finished this course, you might never look at the world the same”. At first i didn’t understand what she meant, but it wasn’t long before i realised, it was true.

Not only did I learn the basic elements and principles of colour and design, I learnt to appreciate more around me in my day to day life. I remember going grocery shopping after a few weeks into the course and being totally mesmerized by the shapes and colours of fruit and vegetables! (Yes, I am insane.)

This fast and furious course had me in a creative frenzy from the start to the end. I made some amazing friends, the genuine kind. You know those creative type that have you in awe of everything they are capable of. I will miss them but forever cherish this short lived experience I had with them.

They were a constant motivation for me through this journey and want to wish them all a successful future doing whatever it is that makes them happy. xx

image via pinterest

from left to right: Jane, Danielle, Gabby, Florine, Dee, Jess, Janelle, KATIE (Teach), Francis, Belinda, Abbey, Naomi, Myself, Bronny and Bec xx 

image taken at www.iscd.edu.au

Curious and curiouser

Have you ever been asked a question by someone that made you go hmmm?

It all started about 7 years ago. I was cutting an older gentleman's hair, making small chitter chatter (as us hairdressers do), when he asked me, so swiftly and very unexpectedly, "So Rachel, whats your passion?''

(................silence...................) I quickly tried to act like I had something.

"Uummmm.....well.....I......it's.....just... .......hmm...?"

I

WAS

STUMPED.

I stewed on this for a long time. Never had I ever really thought about this before.

What was my passion?!!  How did I not know the answer to this?

Was I stupid? Was I boring?

Was I absent-minded?

Was I spending too much time working to pay attention? Did I even know myself properly?

I mean, I liked stuff. I liked shopping? Was that shallow? I liked socialising? but that was not a 'passion'.

Guilt flooded me. For years.

How would I recover from this?  I am not competitive,  I hate team sports, I could barely find my car keys in the morning and NOW I had to find my 'passion' ? 

It was only last week that I got to talking amongst some friends about this story, when I was quickly diverted to a different approach to this so-called search for 'passion'. 

Turns out Elizabeth Gilbert (author of Eat,Pray,Love) has it all figured out.

And for anyone like me, who didn't know what their "thing" was, rest assure, that it's okay.

Apparently, she doesn't believe passion is all that common but is a big advocate for the pursuit of 'curiosity.' 

"We are constantly being told to pursue our passions in life, but there are times when passion is tall order, and really hard to reach. In seasons of confusion, of loss, of boredom, of insecurity, of distraction, the idea of "passion" can feel completely inaccessible and impossible. In such times, you are lucky to be able to get your laundry done (that sometimes feels as high as you can aim) and when someone tells you to follow your passion, you want to give them the middle finger. (Go ahead and do it, by the way. But wait till their back is turned, out of civility.)

But curiosity, I have found, is always within reach.
Passion is a tower of flame, but curiosity is a tiny tap on the shoulder — a little whisper in the ear that says, "Hey, that's kind of interesting…"
Passion is rare; curiosity is everyday.
Curiosity is therefore a lot easier to reach at at times than full-on passion — and the stakes are lower, easier to manage.
The trick is to just follow your small moments of curiosity. It doesn't take a massive effort. Just turn your head an inch. Pause for a instant. Respond to what has caught your attention. Look into it a bit. Is there something there for you? A piece of information?
For me, a lifetime devoted to creativity is nothing but a scavenger hunt — where each successive clue is another tiny little hit of curiosity. Pick each one up, unfold it, see where it leads you next.
Small steps.
Keep doing that, and I promise you: The curiosity will eventually lead you to the passion.
And that'll be the end of boredom.'' - Elizabeth Gilbert

So THANKYOU old man for helping me see that after all these years, I am proud to admit I STILL do not have any one thing I am passionate about, but plenty of tiny taps on the shoulder of curiosity. 

 

 

Everything is temporary.

In all my years of hairdressing, I have had to lend an ear to many clients problems (some hair related) but mostly personal. I hear everything. So not much phases me anymore.

I've had so many deep conversations over the blowdryer, lent an ear and even vented myself!

But I've observed a pattern here over the years (and I'm guilty of this) but, it seems that most of us (including me) are fighting for things to be secure and never changing, but I've very recently noticed thats not really how it works.

Everything in life is temporary and ever-changing. Nothing is guaranteed.

My clients often ask me "What do you think?" or "What should I do?" . Well, i am no expert believe YOU ME! but what i DO know is that the friends or jobs we have this year, may not be the friends or jobs you have next year.

We ALL know this but have you ever really noticed? Nothing really lasts forever.

As sad as this seems, from hairstyles you've had, to holidays you've been on, past friendships you've made, houses you've moved from, the weight you once were..

You guessed it. All TEMPORARY!

Does this philosophy make things easier? or harder? 

Does it make things less heart wrenching? 

Would it make death seem okay?

Would it make a breakup easier to handle?

Would it make the end of a friendship acceptable?

Perhaps? Maybe not? Who knows! But remember, if it helps you cope with the bad shit and move on to embrace and enjoy the good stuff, then go with it!

.......Everything is temporary.

I'm late. And no, I am NOT pregnant.

Yes, I'm late. I'm guilty of it. I started the year guns blazing, with intention to do more STUFF. Stuff i actually like to do. Stuff i actually PREFER to do, like go to the gym, cook, and contribute to my (very neglected) blog!).

At first I thought it was just a busy week, then i thought it was a rough patch, but turns out being busy, running late, lagging behind on tasks, slacking off, whatever you want to call it, it really is just poor time management.

I have recently started an Interior Design Course and suddenly I have been reminded of proper deadlines. Making sure lots of creative work is submitted weekly, on time and NICELY completed. This has resulted in shitty dinners and late nights which = no early gym workouts. (insert sad face here).

So I'm making a promise to myself to prioritise whats IMPORTANT and whats URGENT. My to do lists are no longer just that. Tasks are now in categories of HIGH and LOW levels of urgency. I'm going to stop rambling to people about how busy i have been (terrible habit) and start MAKING time for things that matter to me.

note: entire load of washing got completely ignored this morning whilst I wrote this post, and THATS okay :) 

Breaking up with my 20's

Yep. I have finally hit the big 3-0 and now that I’m freshly post-thirty, I can tell you, with a pretty large amount of certainty, that I'm feeling optimistic about breaking up with my 20's.

Whilst some say it is the decade of 'self discovery', i must share with you what i have so far, 'discovered'...

I can no longer eat the way i used to, but i do anyway and regret it for the rest of the week.
My hair is thinner and grey-er (yes, even as a hairdresser i cannot control this) 
Everything gets a bit softer from the chin, down (including the chin itself)
Even after lots of sleep, i still look tired.
Comfort is my top concern now when purchasing shoes.

on the brighter side:

I have the ability to keep kicking goals and the know-how and wisdom to achieve them (still clumsy enough to delete this post upon completion only to find i hadn't saved it.)
I have accepted that i will never look like Gisele Bunchden, and I'm ok with that (sort of).
I can finally afford to travel to those places i never dreamed i would get to.
I choose strength over skinny
I choose to be happier, healthier and do my best to remain grateful for lifes blessings. 
I will grab my 30's by the balls and enjoy whats to come!

(just not really looking forward to 40!) 

R x

That fresh feeling

For some, getting ones hair done is a luxury. Its often considered a peaceful and relaxing time when in the right environment and when you find the right hairdresser, it's generally a happy experience. Or is it??

Because for me, its normally torture. I enjoy myself to begin with, but i must admit, I'm a terrible client and although I manage to keep a smile on my face, I struggle on the inside and fidget till the end.  

99.9% of the time its nothing personal toward the hairdresser, it's not their fault, it's me. It's only because I am not in the drivers seat and I think EVERY hairdresser is the same.

Yesterday, however I had fun. I was fortunate enough to have Tiffany do my hair. She is everything a good hairdresser should be. She was patient, caring and professional and would do anything to please my needs. (Thanks again Tiff) xx 

We opted for a dark rich brown base colour softened with some gentle golden highlights (to help blend the pesky greys). Completed with a good clean blunt trim and a blow-dry.

Sometimes, as much as us hairdressers hate it, its so nice to be reminded how it feels to be a client again, no matter how torturous it feels for me, I do get it. It's that refreshed feeling when you are finished, that makes it all worth while.

Dream big. I did.

Ideas normally flood my brain, so when it came time to choosing an image for my new salon, I had to call in an expert to help me stay focused and that's when I met Tara, owner and creative directer of design agency, Dream & Do.

Turns out, Tara also happened to be my 'dream catching soul sister' in imagination, design, ideas and dreams so collaborating with her was a breeze.

Tara encouraged me to 'Dream Big' in every aspect. She helped me realise the purpose of my new venture, not just as another business but a personal journey to create balance and enable creativity in my life.

The triangle symbolises just that.

We chose not to mention the word 'hair' in my business name, as style, to me, represents more than hair. Often my clients and I share favourite restaurants, designers, movies, fashion, interiors, everything stylish.

My new blog is a new way that I can continue sharing 'style' with you.

When you are feeling a little flat and in need of inspiration, you may just need to be "Styled by Rachel".

R x

A Reason for Being

For those who do not know me, my name is Rachel, I’m almost 30 and I WAS a workaholic.

Yes. Of all the good things to be addicted to in life, I chose work.

My Dad was diagnosed with leukaemia over a year ago which triggered the realisation to me  that the ratio of my work/life balance was out of whack!

So, what did i do?

I put a plan in place to sell my successful small hair salon, to invest in the things I had lost time for over the years, and redevelop a new business. 

A smaller one. One that i could work from home. One that i have control of.

One that allows me to still enjoy the simple things in life.

So I did. And I love it. 

So, here i share with you my blog. A diary entry of all things I love.

Style, hair, and life.

In this blog, I will express feelings, answer questions, give my advice, and share with you my journey.

Hope you enjoy. Tell me what you think xx